Addictions

These are not in any particular order and something that may work for one person may not work for another person. These are just some of the things that work for me!!!

1. Build a strong SOBER support system!! Surround yourself with people that are clean and sober.

2. Yes it is true get rid off all your old buddies!! Your using buddies that is! You are NOT going to stay clean hanging out with your old using friends!!!! OR, your old boyfriend/girlfriend that you would use with. If you both get clean at the same time and continue being together it is a set up for disaster! If only one of you gets clean and wants to try to save the other, it won’t work! You cannot save the world, only yourself!!

3. Go to the meetings!!! There is a saying in the NA and AA meetings “Keep coming , bring your butt, and your mind will follow!” In other words, keep going, eventually some of it will start to sink in. You will become a NA meeting addict instead of a active drug addict.

4. Don’t think that magically once you stop using drugs and alcohol your problems are going to disappear. It took years to mess up your life this bad and it is not going to be able to be fixed overnight!! Keep your head up and it is much easier to combat your problems with a sober mind and with clear thinking!

5. Try to get help for your underlying problems. Most of us do not wake up one day and say ” I think I want to be a drug addict!” Usually there is a problem within ourselves that we are trying to either run from or cover up. Unearth the demons!! Face up to your problems!! MAN UP!! As some would say!! Get help! See a counseler, go to therapy, get on medication, do whatever you have to do! Everyone does not need medication though!! A lot of times they want to put you on all kinds of anti-depressants and stuff when you get clean. It is not necessary in all cases!! See a therapist! Get a second opinion! If medication is necessary then by all means get on it !! A lot of us use drugs to self-medicate. Also when you do get on your medication, take them the way they are meant to be taken! You can be addicted to anything! So if you are taking to many of the pills that are prescribed to you thats not good either!

6. Learn about the disease of addiction! Knowledge is power my friend! Read up on it. Once you learn the whats and what-fors it is alot easier for you to understand your problem. Once I learned how my brain worked on drugs, and what drugs did to the body it is kind of scary to see what you are doing with yourself!!

7. Keep busy! You know what they say about idle hands! It is true! Keep busy . Pick up a hobby or 2. Get involved. Volunteer, be a better person over all. It will make you feel better inside and out! Don’t let yourself be alone with your head! Your head is what got you into this mess to begin with, keep out of your head and stay busy!

8. DO NOT DWELL ON THE PAST!! It is the past! You cannot change it! Don’t beat yourself up over all the bad things that you have done! It will only bring you down! I mean you have to own up to your responsibilities but please don’t let it bring you down! You will be right back to using if you do this!

9. Change your thinking. Stinking Thinking is what we call it! Your mind is your worst enemy. Change the way you think about things and the way you react to things. It can do a world of difference if you do this. instead of getting mad or angry all the time take a deep breath and think before you speak or react.

10. Shut your mouth and open your ears! You cant hear what people are telling you if you are always talking. A lot of times if you are a newcomer to a meeting the older ones want you to listen. You don’t have anything to say to them! You need to listen. They don’t want to hear you because they have been there. They know what you are going to say! You need to take advice from people who have a lot of clean time!

I would love to hear somethings from you maybe leave me a comment and let me know something that might have worked for you to keep you clean!!

Any input is greatly appreciated!! Thanks!!

Definition of ashamed = to feel shame…

Definition of shame=

the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc., done by oneself or another….

In other words, it is completely natural to feel ashamed or feel shame but should you? Not necessarily.

Being human our first instinct would be to feel this way, but feeling this way is only going to bring you down (even more)

Personally I think an “addict” is a whole different specie of a human. We think and act differently than a so called normal person.

I am not saying that we are inferior, nor or we better than but we are definitely different.

So anyway, personally I am not ashamed of the things that I have done. I am not ashamed of who I am, I am not ashamed. I do not put my head down. I can look people in the eyes and I can say , ” Yeah, I am an addict, I have done some really messed up things in my life, some I am not proud of but No I am not ashamed.” Nor should you be…..EVER……

If we were to sit here and dwell on the past and dwell on our past mistakes we would never be able to heal! To even try to get better we have to look forward. We have to heal.

This is part of step 1 of the Narcotics Anonymous program. So I guess this is where you should start. In the program of narcotics Anonymous they tell you that no matter what Step 1 is the only step that you have to understand. Even if you get no further than that EVER, Step 1 is the “one”.

Step One=

“We admitted that we were powerless over our addiction, that our lives had
become unmanageable.”

Part of our healing is admitting that we are powerless. it’s like raising your hands in defeat and saying “ya got me” I’m done. In doing this it’s like you can breathe a sigh of relief. You do not have to fight anymore! Wave the white flag and say I’M DONE!!!! Remembering at the same time to keep your head up!

Am I an Addict?

Only you can answer this question.

This may not be an easy thing to do. All through our usage, we told ourselves, “I can handle it.” Even if this was true in the beginning, it is not so now. The drugs handled us. We lived to use and used to live. Very simply, an addict is a person whose life is controlled by drugs.

Perhaps you admit you have a problem with drugs, but you don’t consider yourself an addict. All of us have preconceived ideas about what an addict is. There is nothing shameful about being an addict once you begin to take positive action. If you can identify with our problems, you may be able to identify with our solution. The following questions were written by recovering addicts in Narcotics Anonymous. If you have doubts about whether or not you’re an addict, take a few moments to read the questions below and answer them as honestly as you can.

1. Do you ever use alone? [Yes] [No]
2. Have you ever substituted one drug for another, thinking that one particular drug was the problem? [Yes] [ No]
3. Have you ever manipulated or lied to a doctor to obtain prescription drugs? [Yes] [ No]
4. Have you ever stolen drugs or stolen to obtain drugs? [Yes] [ No]
5. Do you regularly use a drug when you wake up or when you go to bed?[Yes] [ No]
6. Have you ever taken one drug to overcome the effects of another? [Yes] [ No]
7. Do you avoid people or places that do not approve of you using drugs? [Yes] [ No]
8. Have you ever used a drug without knowing what it was or what it would do to you? [Yes] [ No]
9. Has your job or school performance ever suffered from the effects of your drug use? [Yes] [ No]
10. Have you ever been arrested as a result of using drugs? [Yes] [ No]
11. Have you ever lied about what or how much you use? [Yes] [ No]
12. Do you put the purchase of drugs ahead of your financial responsibilities?  [Yes] [ No]
13. Have you ever tried to stop or control your using? [Yes] [ No]
14. Have you ever been in a jail, hospital, or drug rehabilitation center because of your using? [Yes] [ No]
15. Does using interfere with your sleeping or eating? [Yes] [ No]
16. Does the thought of running out of drugs terrify you? [Yes] [ No]
17. Do you feel it is impossible for you to live without drugs? [Yes] [ No]
18. Do you ever question your own sanity? [Yes] [ No]
19. Is your drug use making life at home unhappy? [Yes] [ No]
20. Have you ever thought you couldn’t fit in or have a good time without drugs? [Yes] [ No]
21. Have you ever felt defensive, guilty, or ashamed about your using? [Yes] [ No]
22. Do you think a lot about drugs? [Yes] [ No]
23. Have you had irrational or indefinable fears? [Ye] [ No]
24. Has using affected your sexual relationships? [Yes] [ No]
25. Have you ever taken drugs you didn’t prefer? [Yes] [ No]
26. Have you ever used drugs because of emotional pain or stress? [Yes] [ No]
27. Have you ever overdosed on any drugs? [Yes] [ No]
28. Do you continue to use despite negative consequences? [Yes] [ No]
29. Do you think you might have a drug problem? [Yes] [ No]

“Am I an addict?” This is a question only you can answer. We found that we all answered different numbers of these questions “Yes.” The actual number of “Yes” responses wasn’t as important as how we felt inside and how addiction had affected our lives.

Some of these questions don’t even mention drugs. This is because addiction is an insidious disease that affects all areas of our lives—even those areas which seem at first to have little to do with drugs. The different drugs we used were not as important as why we used them and what they did to us.

When we first read these questions, it was frightening for us to think we might be addicts. Some of us tried to dismiss these thoughts by saying:

“Oh, those questions don’t make sense;”

Or,

“I’m different. I know I take drugs, but I’m not an addict. I have real emotional/family/job problems;”

Or,

“I’m just having a tough time getting it together right now;”

Or,

“I’ll be able to stop when I find the right person/get the right job, etc.”

If you are an addict, you must first admit that you have a problem with drugs before any progress can be made toward recovery. These questions, when honestly approached, may help to show you how using drugs has made your life unmanageable. Addiction is a disease which, without recovery, ends in jails, institutions, and death. Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous because drugs had stopped doing what we needed them to do. Addiction takes our pride, self-esteem, family, loved ones, and even our desire to live. If you have not reached this point in your addiction, you don’t have to. We have found that our own private hell was within us. If you want help, you can find it in the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous.

“We were searching for an answer when we reached out and found Narcotics Anonymous. We came to our first NA meeting in defeat and didn’t know what to expect. After sitting in a meeting, or several meetings, we began to feel that people cared and were willing to help. Although our minds told us we would never make it, the people in the fellowship gave us hope by insisting that we could recover. Surrounded by fellow addicts, we realized that we were not alone anymore. Recovery is what happens in our meetings. Our lives are at stake. We found that by putting recovery first, the program works. We faced three disturbing realizations:

1. We are powerless over addiction and our lives are unmanageable;

2. Although we are not responsible for our disease, we are responsible for our recovery;

3. We can no longer blame people, places, and things for our addiction. We must face our problems and our feelings.

“The ultimate weapon for recovery is the recovering addict.”¹

1. Narcotics Anonymous 5th Ed. (Van Nuys, CA Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc., 1988) p. 15.

←To Whom It May Concern:

It is probably to late to say “I’m sorry” and the words don’t seem to be able to take away what I have done to you and to myself. I am who I am and I cannot change that. I wish to be accepted and taken for who I am. At this time I do not need to be yelled at, for I am already screaming at myself inside my own head. I do not need to be beaten up for I have beaten myself up inside already also. I need your understanding and help. I cannot take back the things I have said and done. I just hope that the damage that I have done can be forgiven.  I have shamed you and I have shamed myself. I know the things that I have done are wrong but I do not wish to dwell on them. I need for you to be open and understanding and help me in my time of need. I am asking you for this because I know that I need to change and I want to change. this may not be the first time that you have heard this but at least i try. I am far from perfect and I will probably never be perfect. Especially now after all this. i just wish for your acceptance and understanding. i know that together we can get through this if you would just give me another chance. I f i happened to fail please do not scold me. Please help me get back and try again for that is all i know how to do is to try to get better.. i cannot promise you that i will but i can promise you that i will try

I will get to posting where to go for help in the future. As for right now if you happen to stumble on this page and you need help ASAP please leave me a comment and I will try to help you in whatever you may need……Please don’t ever think that you are bothering me or anything!!!! I am here to help!!!! Thanks!!!

I know addict seems like a harsh word and when you think of the word you may think of a dirty person who is on the streets and have a major drug problem. I know that was the stereotype that I thought of everytime I would see the word.  More recently i have found that an addict can be addicted to numerous things in life you can be addicted to work school people drugs things money food everything and everyone has the capacity to become an addict or have an addiction. If you do want help for your addiction the very first step IS ADMITTING THAT YOU ARE AN ADDICT……

This blog is going to be about my findings and dealings with addictions. I hope to help and also inform numerous different types of people. I have found that any addiction no matter what it is is almost about the same. I mean there are alot of things that people are sddicted to but mainly the same feelings and emotions inside are sometimes similar between addicts. So hopefully this blog will be informative and helpful to people. I am just going to go with the flow and see where this takes me so deal with me here. If you have any comments or suggestions please speak up. Thanks for reading and stick with me here I guarantee that you will laugh, you will learn something, and you will have fun here…..THANKS!!! Angel

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